SC: A study by the Ocean Wildlife Campaign

[tim]

that's okay..

[Tadashi]

hi Ron,
OA: A study by the Ocean Wildlife Campaign urged states to undertake a number of remedies to reverse a decline in the shark population, including establishing size limits for shark catches, closing state waters for shark fishing during pupping season, and requiring commercial fishers to have federal shark permits.

"including" here works as a preposition and it modifies "a number of remedies."

I am not questioning the OA. I just think that the preposition phrase is too far away from "a number of remedies".
The preposition phrase may mislead readers to think that "including XX,XX and XX" modifies "a decline" or "shark population".

what do you think, Ron?
Thanks.
Tadashi.

[RonPurewal]

But they're remedies to reverse a decline in the shark population. That's a single thought; it's what they are. You can't place "including" in a place that will break up that thought.

So, given the context, "including" is placed as close as possible to "remedies".

Sometimes it's just not possible to put modifiers very close at all.

If you don't like this sentence, then you'll hate the correct version of OG Diagnostic #50. Go take a look.

Where did you propose to put "including"?

[Tadashi]

haha,
I'll check it out.
I am starting to love that kind of use of "including" now.
Thanks for your explanation.
Tadashi.

[RonPurewal]

Sure.