Please grade my essay -

[mbudanova03]

Analysis of Issue Essay Time - 30 minutes

"Some people argue that those who do not send their children to public schools should not have to fund these schools through taxes, since neither parents nor children benefit from these schools. They ignore the fact that everyone benefits from the strong economy that a well-educated populace generates"

The author provides 2 points of view on tax funds which are spent on private schools and that those funds benefit the society in general. Even if those members of the society do not use these benefit directly and do not attend the public schools. The author claims that the society benefits from a strong economy which is generated by well-educated populace. This statement is supported by the fact that even if children go to private schools and do not take advantage of the public school facilities, in the long run these children as well as their parents will benefit from educated society. A closer examination of this issue reveals that if people do not send their children to public schools they do not benefit from these schools and the fact that stronger education is advantageous to the whole society is logical but not correlated to the funds that should be spent by parents on schools which their children do not attend.
First, the funds generated by taxpayers have multiple purposes and the amounts that are supposed to be spent on education which includes public schools, universities, teachers' trainings, books and research programs, will not benefit the taxpayers and their children who attend private schools. Private schools have their own educational programs and their teachers who work on commercial bases and earn more money than teachers in public schools are financed by the parents of the children who attend this schools. Hence, the parents of the children do finance the educational system twice: through taxes and through direct payments to private schools. In most developed countries, people who do not use cars, do not pay transport taxes. If the person owns the car, he or she pays the taxes on this particular car and his or her neighbor does not pay anything for this car.
Secondly, the author claims that everyone will benefit from a strong society and the money spent on public schools will raise the level of education and future leaders, managers and members of society will receive generally better education through these fund and will be able to run the economy in an efficient way. This assumption seems to be dubious due to the fact the author cannot know who will become leaders and members of the society who will be in power. It is not clear if there is correlation between future benefits and current funds from taxpayers that are spent on public schools. Perhaps, future leaders will come from private schools and these money would be better spend equally for public and for private schools but we do not know it from the reference and the information given does not allow us to make such assumptions.
In conclusion, the author does not say how exactly the society will benefit from funding the public schools rather than private ones. Why not then split the funding into equal parts between public and private sectors of educations? This information is not given and the conclusion as it stands does not sound profound and mature. To strengthen the arguments the author should have provided the statistics how exactly and to which extent the children from public school would benefit the society.

[StaceyKoprince]

Hi, thanks for posting your essays! Just an FYI that instructors don't grade or give feedback on essays (see the forum guidelines for details).

But I certainly hope other community members respond. Also, if you're in our class, you'll have an opportunity to get essays graded and get written feedback during the course (after class 6). Finally, you can get essays graded by GMAT Write (the official essay grading service from the makers of the exam) - they'll both grade the essays and provide feedback as to how to improve (for a fee). For details and pricing, go to www.mba.com and search for GMAT Write.

[daretosayiloveyou]

I certainly agree with you Stacey, but as a whole the essay is good. Keep posting.