Does the conclusion escape you? Has understanding the tone of the passage gotten you down? Get help here.
yo4561
Course Students
 
Posts: 112
Joined: Thu Jun 04, 2020 3:42 pm
 

Modifier vs. Core: Part 2, pg 61 in All the Verbal

by yo4561 Sat Dec 12, 2020 3:40 pm

Hi! For the example on page 61 "The CEO declared that everyone had to work through the holidays to make the production deadline, but in calling for such an extreme measure, she upset her employees to the point of mutiny." If you added a comma after the but to offset the modifier "in calling for such an extreme measure", would this be incorrect?

What would be a correct example using the structure Independent clause, conjunction modifier, independent clause?
I just find this structure laid out on page 61 a bit weird, and I realize that the first example on this topic beginning on page 60 is incorrect. However, can you use this structure correctly?
esledge
Forum Guests
 
Posts: 1181
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2005 6:33 am
Location: St. Louis, MO
 

Re: Modifier vs. Core: Part 2, pg 61 in All the Verbal

by esledge Sat Dec 26, 2020 4:01 pm

I think it would be wrong to put another comma after the "but," mainly because it isn't needed and maybe because it changes the meaning. It's probably easier to see this in an example with a shorter middle modifier, as requested below:
yo4561 Wrote:What would be a correct example using the structure Independent clause, conjunction modifier, independent clause?

Correct: The CEO imposed mandatory 60-hour workweeks, but in doing so, she upset her employees to the point of mutiny.
Incorrect: The CEO imposed mandatory 60-hour workweeks, but, in doing so, she upset her employees to the point of mutiny.

"But in doing so" is a whole phrase. The second example acts as if "in doing so" is a whole modifier (which it could be), but that leaves the "but" to go with the rest of the sentence. Check out the incorrect example with the modifier removed:

Incorrect: The CEO imposed mandatory 60-hour workweeks, but ... she upset her employees to the point of mutiny.

This doesn't make sense because imposing the long workweeks was how she upset her employees, not some kind of contrasting idea.
Emily Sledge
Instructor
ManhattanGMAT